Showing posts with label sattwik sarkar. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sattwik sarkar. Show all posts
Saturday, 16 November 2013
Friday, 15 November 2013
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Wednesday, 13 November 2013
Wednesday, 1 May 2013
The Final Push
He had been mistreated with, beaten up and tortured, and now
he was being pushed into an abandoned warehouse by three thugs.
Bloody…defenseless…there was no strength left in him retaliate anymore.
Somewhere down he knew he had given up hope.
They took him to the center of the floor and pushed him down
on his knees. The place was dark. Hardly any light was being able to penetrate the
soot covered window panes. Whatever light could pass through was getting
diffused by a thick cloud of dust that all the shuffling and pushing had
created around him.
The gangsters stood, surrounding him. One of them took out
pistol pointed it at his forehead. He was saying something, but he couldn't hear anything, everything was sounding very blur. As he looked up to stare at
the cold barrel of the gun, he thought to himself, “This is it then. Here is
where it all ends. Guess no one will even find the body…but at least it’s a
Colt. Always been such a fun…” Exhausted, he drifted into his thoughts, as he
bowed down his head and closed his eyes. He could almost hear wife’s voice, so
sweet. It almost made him smile.
Suddenly, there was a feeling of strength inside of him. It
was the final surge of power that he had left in him. Gathering up all the
courage he had, he jumped up, throwing the gunman off balance. To his own
surprise he could gather enough energy to overpower all three thugs, who were
shaken and confused by what had just happened. He wasn't supposed to retaliate.
Finishing with the last one, just as he turned around, a sudden pain stung him
on his forehead. It was blinding.
It must have taken a few seconds to get his vision to be
clear again…at least as clear as it could get anymore. He opened his eyes, and
looked up. He was staring at the business end of an 1873 5 1/5’’ Colt. The
three gangsters stood towering around him. The gunman’s voice started to become
clearer. “Hey Jackass!! Were you even listening to what I was telling you all
this while? Or did you die on me or something?” he yelled.
He could not resist himself. With the last bit of strength
that he had, he looked up, staring at the gunman in the eyes. Feeling freer
than ever, he chuckled under his breadth and said, “Fuck you”.
And then, BANG.
Sunday, 11 November 2012
There is no place like home
The look of the place, the smell of it, every corner of this
place is so very familiar, so very known; they are so close to the heart, because
there is no place like home.
It has been a long time I have been away from this place,
which hold a very special place in my heart. In fact it has been too long.
Someone once told me that, when you return home, to your city, to where you
reside, after a long time, it is then you understand how beautiful it truly is.
Yesterday I realized how true this statement is. As the flight started to descend
below the clouds, giving a bird’s eye view of the city, which looked like it
had dressed up for a special occasion, I realized something. Kolkata had never
looked this beautiful to me before, as if I was seeing it for the first time, in
brand new way.
Here’s the funny thing, when a plan is about to touch down, I
do not know if anyone ever pays attention to this or not, but for about ten odd
seconds it keeps hovering inches above the ground, as if to tease you. I have
never really noticed this detail, but yesterday it gave me a funny feeling in
my tummy. And about the moment the wheels touched the ground, believe me for I am
not kidding, my heart skipped a beat. There was a lump in my throat. I was
home. I guess these are a few things that just happen, it is not a feeling you
need to try and get.
It is funny how things in your home stay exactly the way they
were, no matter how long you have been away from it. It is amazing how we take
no time to get comfortable, and settle back in. And it truly amazes me how the
food you get at home is always better than anything you have tasted. Does not matter if you have been to the best of restaurants, stayed in the best of
suits, when you come home and get to lie down in your own bed, and your mother
feeds you homemade rice and meat, there is no place on earth you rather be.
The beauty of the place we call home is, I guess, almost
impossible to define.
It is a place which is there for you, like a friend, always
waiting with its arms wide open.
It is somewhere you find peace and solace.
Truly, there is no place like home.
Thursday, 8 November 2012
Time: the push we need
Life is a tough task master. At times life can get very rosy,
but you can be rest assured, that means life is just planning something weird for
you. It always seems to me that, every moment of our life has conditions
applied to them. Happy moments tend to fade away, and sad ones always come to
an end, giving way to numerous reasons for us to smile.
A few days back as I was writing one of my previous blogs, a
thought struck my mind, that of the importance of time in our lives. Usually we
do not really think about it, but time is a friend we have who helps us deal
with situations. When we feel lost, down, or beaten, we tell ourselves, time
will heal. I disagree. Time does not heal. On the contrary, like a strict coach
who pushes his trainee till he learns to be strong, time keeps pushing us, no
matter how low we feel, till we can get up and walk again. On the other hand, when we are
over excited about something, it slowly fades away the excitement, so that we
can look forward to the new moments of excitement and joy of the future.
I guess, this is because time has not been taught how to
slow down. It, therefore, teaches us the importance of moving on in life.
Time does not sympathies with us.
It gives us that push to forget and keep walking.
Be it a happy moment or a sad one, it keeps pushing us
forward, as if to tell us, “new and important things are waiting for you, and I
don’t want you to miss it.”
Tuesday, 6 November 2012
A True Friend
Friends, one of those pieces without which, life would
literally cease to have any meaning. They come and go as time keeps pushing us
ahead. It is funny how easily we build relationships with people, in our schools,
colleges, in our workplaces, and how easily we lose touch. Only a few stay, and
fewer is the number with whom we can connect at a very personal level.
I am lucky to have one such friend. To whom I can express my
every feeling, and believe me you, this friend can be the best friend,
philosopher and guide one can have. I am talking about someone called “MUSIC”.
A few hours back, I sat down to play my guitar a little, and
this thought struck my mind. It’s amazing how music is there for all our moods,
for every moment of our lives. Whatever I might be feeling, when I take out my
guitar, and strum those strings for the first time, it somehow, in a magical
way comes out with a sound which fit my present mind set, as if to understand
what I am feeling.
Be it at a party with yours crazy friends, or be it when you
are sitting on a rooftop, segregated from the whole world, when you need
someone to understand you, music is always there. True, music is not an
individual entity, it is created by individuals, but somehow music, the songs,
tracks or whatever you may call it, can have a personality of its own. It is
there with you when you feel like head banging your head off your shoulder, or
when you are with your special person, and you need someone to help you win her
over.
It is beautiful, this thing we call music.
Life’s road is not
that easy,
It is there to make the rough road of life, that much
smoother.
Sunday, 4 November 2012
You learn to fall in love
A few months ago, I had to move away from my home town,
Kolkata, and shift to Delhi for my higher education. My initial feeling towards
the city was therefore, that of dislike. I could not bring myself to like
anything. Everything about it got on my nerve, as I kept comparing Delhi to Kolkata.
It has been almost three and half months now, and I have
come to realise that, I am starting to like the city. The last few weekends I
have spent roaming around the city, specially the old parts of it, and well, it
is unique. Where Kolkata has a very classy, colonial feel to it, Delhi has a
very traditional beauty. The thing I love about Delhi is its heritage.
I have been visiting the numerous monuments that are
scattered all over the city, India Gate, Hauz Khas, Red Fort, Chandni Chowk,
Jamah Masjid, Qutub Minar, Jantar Mantar and a few more places, and frankly
they leave me awestruck. It is really hard to explain how beautiful and
peaceful they are. A few days back, I got the opportunity to visit Jamah
Masjid, and instantly fell in love with it. I have heard people say that when
you visit a religious places, they make you feel peaceful, and believe me, that
is exactly what I felt as I entered the premises. I could spend hours, just
sitting there. Yes, the road leading up to the stairs can be a little intimidating
but, it is worth pushing through the sea of people. For my friend it is Qutub Minar.
She says the exact same things about the Minar. I like it too, but for me it is
Jamah Masjid, who has stolen my heart.
The city is a cramped one, filled with excessive traffic,
too much people, confusing roads, and an expensive cost of living, but there
are places away from the hustle-bustle of the fast life, where peace rules.
I have realised that,
the initial dislike that I had grown towards the city is now fading from my
heart.
There are many corners of the city, which are yet to be
explored.
Many more places to see.
I hope this city, slowly but surely, makes me fall in love.
Saturday, 3 November 2012
They are better then we'll ever be
“If you pick up a starving dog and make
him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a
dog and man.”
― Mark Twain
― Mark Twain
They are innocent. Helpless, they live
every waking moment of their lives in fear. Fear of being beaten, kicked or
killed for no good reason what-so-ever. As few days back, I happened to overhear
a group of boys boasting about how one of them got drunk, and ran over three
street dogs in one night. It got me thinking, how can we humans
be so cruel? We
are always bragging about how we human beings, are the most intelligent living beings
that exists on the face of this planet, because we have the most developed
brains, we have the power to reason. Where is that reasoning when we kill just
for fun? Apparently, our highly
developed brains tells us that, only human lives have a value. All other living
creatures are worthless.
People may judge me for saying this, but,
at times I feel like humans don’t deserve even a percentage of what the Almighty
has made available to them. Apparently everything is God’s plan. I am pretty
sure God did not want his “children” to run around like fools, killing anything that
they see.
What I fail to understand is, how can we
be so cruel to these beautiful creatures? When I hear people saying, “I wish I could
feel true love”, I always have a strong urge of asking them to keep a pet dog,
for they are living examples of the definition of love. It is true, they know
how to love, better than you, me, or anyone can ever begin to imagine. I lost
my pet a few months ago, and let me tell you, they take a huge part of you away
with them. It feels like your life has been taken away from you. Such is the
power of their love. They can be a protector if required, a friend if needed,
a teddy bear if you need something to cuddle, and they can be the shoulder you
cry on. They are all those things that keep a person happy bundled into one.
They are mesmerizing characters. We don’t understand that they don’t understand
the concept of hate. They need our love to survive.
Instead, we treat them like dirt, like they do not have any right to live. Like we are the ones to decide what their
lives are going to be like. Like they are a burden in our lives. It is fun for
us to kick them while they are sleeping. Beating them up if they make a small
mistake makes us feel like the superior beings. Why can’t we understand that
they are innocent?
What have they ever done to us? Some may
say they bite us. Here is my answer to them; they bite because they are pushed
over the edge. When a dog bites, understand that it has been through more
torture than you can think of, without protesting. Like us, they too have limitations
to their patience.
The beautiful thing about them is, they
do not have a grey region in their thinking. There are no ifs and buts for
them. If they like something, love something, they do it with all of their
heart and soul, and on the other hand if they don’t like something, they try
really hard to make us understand their dislike.
They might not have the capacity to
reason, but that gives them an advantage over us, that of having a pure heart.
The very reasoning power that we are so very proud of has only brought us evils
like hatred, jealousy, anger, suspicion, envy. I do not deny that the
advancement of our minds have brought all the good things in the world too, but
every deal has its’ side effects.
They are homeless.
They do not have the ability to earn,
yet they don’t want anything from us.
All they want is a little space in this
huge planet.
A little love and understanding from us.
They are innocent. Scared. Helpless.
If there is any part of us humans which
is good, we need to stop hurting them just because they are weak. But then
again, the lesser you expect from humans, the happier you can be.
They are better than we can ever be.
Friday, 2 November 2012
Its a beautiful world
Journal Entry #1
It comes as a blessing to the nature, cleansing it of all the dust and dirt. The most beautiful thing that i can think of on a rainy day, are the leaves of a tree. How many times do we stop and take some time out of our apparently "very busy" life to look at these beautiful living things dancing and rejoicing to the music of the raindrops.
Today was a beautiful day. No, nothing unexpected or unusual happened, but i had an unusually nice experience. Let me tell you, it is fun to take a metro ride in the pouring rain. People find it irritating at times, I do too at times, all the rain drenched grumpy looking people stacked together like a flock of sheep into one compartment, it can get on your nerves at times, but today, i tried to enjoy it for once.
As i stood there near the door and observed the compartment, i saw few very interesting things. The first were a group of office goes, all irritated and grumpy about the weather, their wet clothes, and, well with anything that came close to them. Second were the stops. Every time the doors of the train opened, the on-boarding passengers-all drenched or equipped with wet umbrellas where greeted with utter disgust.
But here is the most interesting thing i observed. In one corner of the compartment, a kid, about 10 years old was seated next to a young lady, who looked pretty annoyed with the current conditions, and on top of that, at every two minutes, the little kid would shake his head, spraying some water on the lady, adding to her irritation. Then he would look up at his victim, with a big smile and a innocent glow in his eyes. The lady kept making an irritated face to make him stop, but our little trouble maker kept on enjoying himself.
Its funny; this life. We get so busy with trying to get what we want, in trying to get to the top of the food chain, that we forget how much we enjoy having fun. Irritation becomes our default instinct to everything.
But, stop.
Think.
You will see that the very world we keep blaming all the time for making our lives dull, is trying so very hard to make you smile.
The Silence
The word "home" is defined as a place where one lives. So, going by the definition, it would mean that, when one shifts from one place to another, one's home moves along with the person. His residence becomes his new home. Well, I choose to disagree.
A
few weeks back, a couple to be precise, I moved out of my home, or my permanent
residence as the government would have it, and moved into a hostel in a
different city from my hometown, for my higher education. This is the first
time I have had to move out of my home, my hometown permanently, and now I know the true meaning of the word "home". Home is where the heart is. Home
is where the love is. It is where you are loved, even when you make the
silliest of mistakes. It is where the pampering of your parents and elders is.
Home is where forgiveness is free. I understand it now. They say, one does not understand, or rather they under estimate the true value of something when
they have it, it's only when you lose it, you realize its true value.
It's as true as it gets.
I used to live in a home where I was the king. Everything was a whistle blow away. Now I live in a hostel, sharing a room with two other boys. Almost all the time I am mute. There are times, like this very moment, when I realize that it's been hours that I had last uttered a word or spoken to someone, and by someone, I also include myself. Yes, I talk to myself.
It's been a rough beginning to my journey alone, without the comforts of my home, and i can say this without any doubt in my mind, I MISS MY HOME. I might have moved out and away from the place i call my home but somehow, a part of me has stayed back There is a strong urge inside of me to make whatever space i have in my hostel room, look like my room, so that i feel that mush closer to my castle.
It's been a rough beginning to my journey alone, without the comforts of my home, and i can say this without any doubt in my mind, I MISS MY HOME. I might have moved out and away from the place i call my home but somehow, a part of me has stayed back There is a strong urge inside of me to make whatever space i have in my hostel room, look like my room, so that i feel that mush closer to my castle.
I
have read in so many books, and seen in many a movies, that when you move away
from a place which you love with all your heart and soul, a place you know by
heart, to its tinniest detail, a place where you can move around with your eyes
closed, a place whose every texture, every smell, marking etc is known to you, you don't really move out, because your soul stays back. Like a ghost, half of
your heart stays back and keeps saying things that the other half doesn't want
to listen. Maybe it does, but it in no way can.
It's
a big hard world and it beats you black and blue till you are numb. We are
supposed to be strong, and carry on with whatever life puts in front of us. I
had thought it's not that tough, everyone around me is doing it, how tough can
it possibly be? But now I realize it's a hard struggle. It's almost as if
you declare war inside you own mind. One half says, “It’s not worth the
pain, go back home and do whatever you want from there”, and the other half
says, “Don’t be a loser; you know it has to be done.”
This world can make you feel pretty lonely if it wants to. It has some amazing tools. There are people, like me, who would rather spend time alone. They like their space. In the comforts of their zone, it's always I, me, and myself time. When people ask why, they would say things like, "I like silence". I said it a million times. I did not realize how much noise silence actually makes. It is, in its truest sense, deafening. Silence, screams at you, and makes you feel like your head is going to explode and there is nothing you can do; nothing at all.
We
have our own tools to counter these feelings of loneliness. According to me,
the strongest weapons we have are our friends. But, I am not talking about just
any tom dick or harry we say hi to or stop in the corridors of our
institutions, to talk to. No; I am talking about the friends who know the A to
Zs of the person you are, the people who you can count on. People you can call
up at one am in the morning and enquire about what the time is because you think
your cell phone is showing the wrong time. Friends like these are hard to find,
but you can always bet a million bucks on these people, that no matter how
tough it gets, they will 'defend the silver lining'. Yes, it has been weird a
start, but God has been good to me, by keeping a really close friend, really
close to me. Like most movies, my days have a comic relief too. The only thing
that has kept me going for the last two weeks has been the time I have spent
with this very special person. My “best buddy” you would say. As every day
comes to an end I return to my prison like hostel room; the only thing that
keeps me going through the night is the thought that I’ll get to spend time
with the person I hold so close to my heart, the next day.
As
we age, life starts becoming more and more taxing on every aspect of our lives,
be it mentally, physically or socially. We are supposed to adapt to the
changes, never look back and move on, without asking any question. But, at times even though in our mind we know we have to, our hearts keep yearning for things
to remain the way they are. Our hearts never want to let go, it never wants
change.
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